Just Keep Swimming

I’ve found that being home is way busier than hotel life, which is pretty ironic because this past weekend was the least I’ve ever left the couch. There’s just so much more to do around here, which leaves a lot less room and time for blogging. I could tell it was time to blog when I had a bunch of unread texts and emails sitting on my phone for days. So here we go!Last time I mentioned we had to drive BACK to the cancer center, which is exactly what we did. We drove 12 hours round trip (twice) last week in order to meet my new doctor and get another scan done of my head AND spine. Luckily the scan was “good” which means the tumor hasn’t grown back (or at least not in its entirety). I also got a spinal tap done last week and that wasn’t super pleasant either. It’s given me a worse headache and a sore lower back which makes it hard to “rest” when I’m a stay at home mom to a two year old. I feel like I complain on here a lot but 
So although we got more encouraging news, this week has been a rough one and it’s only Tuesday! I was bed ridden most of the weekend which was no fun because we had friends in town and I hate being a crappy host. I was telling Michael the other day that I can really relate to Dory. That’s what I’ve become. A fish with short term memory loss. It’s gotten so bad since last week and I’m not sure why (it’s probably from the brain stuff…if I had to guess). It’s taken me 2 days to write this dang update because of my memory. Seriously, every other sentence or text message I forget what I’m writing about in the middle of it. 
Well, tomorrow is the big day! Tomorrow I let Michael take scissors and a razor to my head, every 3 days for what we hope is the foreseeable future. If I’m not able to keep wearing it, it probably means it’s not working and if I’m going to shave my lumpy head and walk around in my super cool, sci-fi cap, I want it to work! Having it all happen over a longer period has helped me with it all emotionally. Only losing the huge chunk in the center (which was not fun) was probably a good Segway into shaving it all. I’ve gotten used to how it feels so hopefully it won’t be too much of a shocker tomorrow although I’m sure it will be. I’m not kidding myself. 

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17 thoughts on “Just Keep Swimming

  1. Praying praying praying for you and your family. I have been thinking about you quite a bit since your last post (Praying it had not grown back so quickly) and hoping we would hear from you soon. Or like my momma used to say “no news is good news. So on to the next step and keeping you and this next phase of your treatment in constant prayer. God bless you and your family. Thanks for the update.

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  2. Do you know what, Stephanie? Once I got used to being hairless, I loved it! Except for the fact that I’m chicken, I’d shave it off again and I’ve been in remission for 11 years! It’s really convenient to just plop on a hat or a wig. Either way, please be assured that the prayers from St. Mary are continuing in full force!!!

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  3. You will be beautiful either way!! Just know so many of your fellow parishioners, family and friends from near and afar are lifting you in prayer. God has you in the palm of His hand♥

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  4. I’ve seen so many women lose their hair. And although the ones who find wigs that look like their natural hair are less shocking, maybe easier on the eyes, the ones who rock the cool hats and scarves or even the bald heads with huge earrings, are so beautiful, as long as they keep their smile and swagger. And you do have a beautiful smile and tons of swagger!

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  5. Good for you for hanging in there!! Yes, lots of prayers from St. Mary :):)! I can imagine feeling weird about shaving, but your new apparatus will make fashion statements everywhere you go !!

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  6. Hang in there. Please tell your beloved husband Jay and Cheryl Cavendish say hello. We think of you and your family often and lift you all in prayer. I keep a verse in my wallet. Isaiah 40:29 He gives power to the weak and to those who have no might He increases strength. God bless you!!

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  7. Thank you Stephanie for the update. I pray for you daily. I was getting worried when there wasn’t a blog for awhile. My faith should have been stronger. He answered my prayer for you again. Feel better. You are beautiful with or without hair. God bless you and your family!

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  8. I’m so glad you had friends visit you. I know that had to be a happy time for everyone! I am praying for you daily. Hang in there…

    31 but those who hope in the Lord
    will renew their strength.
    They will soar on wings like eagles;
    they will run and not grow weary. ~ Isaiah 40:31

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  9. We love you, Stephanie! We are all still praying for you. I know that shaving your head is a big deal, but I promise you, with that big beautiful smile you have, who would even notice it? Miss you!

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  10. Dear, you don’t complain as much as you think you do. Honestly, with all you are facing we could expect you to complain more. But you are doing an amazing job taking things as they come. I pray you continue to have the strength and endurance to just keep swimming!

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  11. I’m a friend of your husbands Uncle John and I’m a cancer survivor. Losing my hair was a big worry of mine when I started treatment, but once it was gone, it was oddly calming and empowering. It’s not that it was all sunshine and buttercups after I shaved it off, but being released from the dread and anticipation of it lightened the worry bucket more than I imagined it would…kind of like preparing for battle. I pray that this will be the case for you and that this will soon be the only scar from your successful battle… until it grows back!

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  12. You are Beautiful, with or without hair ! Your beauty is not only skin deep. “Just keep swimming..”….God is doing the side stroke right along side of you !
    My prayers for a healthy outcome continue.

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  13. This is YOUR blog – you write whatever you want – complain all you want – you should NEVER apologize about that, honey. We are here to “listen” and be on this journey with you as much as we “can”. I had a few spinal taps and they are no fun – sorry you had to go through that. SO happy though to read that the second scan looks GOOD! Thank you GOD. And I was serious – even if you didn’t read my last comment – see about finding a WIG! Have “fun” with it – go blonde – go rainbow even? 😀 Wouldn’t that be fun. Sarah would want to wear the wig too! CHIN up – and don’t worry about being a crappy host – heck you are going through a lot – no one expects you to be a host. CHIN up hon – ❤

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  14. If you have time please read Appointments With Heaven by Dr Reggie Anderson. I think it will bring you comfort in these trying times. God bless you and your family..I can’t imagine.

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  15. Oh my gosh! You look absolutely gorgeous! It’s only hair, it will grow back.
    I had mine shaved on March 5th, after it was falling out from treatment. I have been blonde my entire life and it’s growing back dark. Those darn chemo meds that save our lives can play havoc on the rest of our bodies

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